I wanted to drop in here in the gallery, not having updated it in a while. Things might continue so on or they might not. I have been drawing and not drawing. Things are metastasizing within me in a way that is part of life and the passing of time. I drew this cat in paint with my track pad, and pondered upon it. I am both feeling rusty regarding my ability - I think this is natural for a person who used to be drawing so completely constantly as I was in my youth, but who no longer is - but I also feel a confidence, or: the value doesn't lie in the result, and so it does not have that fraught preciousness, as everything can be recreated, it is in and from my hands. But it has become even more of a black box to me, what is contained within these hands.. yet I trust them to work and to be able to learn what is missing. Hm.
Gentlemen, this is sort of the hog I have been wrestling in the mud pit of my mind. As you might know I have been searching for the Point and the Purpose (never do this with the aim to find, but exploratorily.. well I suppose it cannot be helped, much as we must create then we must search; these are not seperate endeavors). I'm not sure what I am making anymore and for what, I cannot itch the itch as I once did, as the ailment has changed, so I've been.. I've been really walking in circles in the thinking phase of things, I've been searching history and I've been exploring and learning and watching the boundaries between all decompose. Can I say I have been creating art by eating dinner and gathering seeds and looking at clouds? This must be all encompassing if it is to make any sense to me; in the way that sense exists in nonsense as everything will contain its opposite by definition.
This all truly started as in gained the momentum to effectuate itself into existence when I truly truly was disillusioned with the flat paper surface painting and so on creature. And I've been feeding this whole mess morsels as it metastasizes, as I said, and I think I am in a good place with it all currently, even if everything I love feels like it overwhelms me so.
Well that is not the point, I wanted to say something more concrete with this. Disregard all of the above and read this:
You will get to see more things when I feel the need to share them. I would like to sort something out with my real world created works, they've got something else.. and they're barely present on this site. I am working on many things at some kind of speed or not! That is all I should've said, friends: I am working on many things.
Until then,
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